


Murder, Mystery & Makeup Memories

by MaggieMaybe160



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Feels, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, Makeup, Memories, Sam Winchester is Interested in Serial Killers, Short & Sweet, Sweet, YouTube, Youtuber Bailey Sarian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:53:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23130502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaggieMaybe160/pseuds/MaggieMaybe160
Summary: Sam reminisces about Jessica when he finds comfort in a new Youtube series.
Relationships: Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	Murder, Mystery & Makeup Memories

Sam has his headphones in as he slouches in his seat, his knee against the car door. He can still faintly hear Dean’s music, but it doesn’t bother him. He may complain about the volume, but it’s a small comfort. On his phone, Sam is watching Youtube. He’d recently found a channel that made him feel good despite the chaos around him. The world may be ending, but at least he could watch this LA woman talk about true crime and serial killers while doing her makeup. Her name is Bailey Sarian and even though she doesn’t look like Jess, she reminds him of her. 

Sam had always been interested in true crime and serial killers. As Dean said: monsters he got, humans are crazy. Jessica Moore had the same interest. They’d accidentally spent an entire date geeking out and talking about different cases. When they moved in together, they had a routine of talking about new cases or cases they were researching for their law classes while they got ready in the morning. She would sit cross-legged on their bed, her curly blonde hair tied back into the messiest bun Sam would ever see, and she would do her makeup while they talked. 

“How does it look?” she would ask in the middle of some intense case, looking up from her mirror with those gorgeous blue eyes that Sam loved with his entire being. 

“You look perfect,” he would answer and he meant it every time. It didn’t matter if the makeup wasn’t finished, her hair was still up in a wild mess. To him, everything about her was beautiful and radiant.

It’s been fourteen years since she died, and when he clicked on “Murder, Mystery & Makeup” by Bailey Sarian, he hadn’t expected the instant tug of longing, the stitches in his heart ripping open. He hadn’t expected to watch the videos and feel the warm nostalgia and comfort flood him. But it did. 

November is particularly hard. It doesn’t matter how many years pass. Halloween used to be bad, but now it physically hurts. It was the last time he saw the woman he was going to propose to alive. It was the last time he’d seen her smile. The last time she’d been able to tell him that she loved him. It’s November and everything in the world is bleak, but Bailey Sarian posted a video that morning to talk about some sick case in Ukraine and somehow it melts away the sorrow. 

He vaguely wonders if he and Dean will ever show up on this Youtube channel. What would Bailey even say about them? “Sadly, soon after Sam, the youngest son, was born… Their mom died in a nursery fire. Yeah. And John, the dad, says demons did it. Suspish.” Would she glance over Jessica’s death? “Then, Jessica, Sam’s girlfriend, died in their apartment. His friends reported that he left school and they didn’t hear from him for weeks after. Reports say their apartment was lit on fire. There are theories that John, the dad, killed Jessica in the same way because he was mad at Sam for ever even going to college.  _ Okay. _ ” 

“Dude,” Dean interrupts, hitting Sam lightly on the arm. Sam pauses and pulls out his headphones, looking over at his brother. “Are you watching a makeup tutorial?” 

“What? No.” Sam hides the phone screen, his save haven. “Keep your eyes on the road.” 

“Should we stop at Ulta so you can follow along?” Dean asks. 

“She’s going over a serial killer case,” Sam tells him. 

“Oh, god. Not this serial killer shit again. Why. Why, Sam?” He’s smiling and shaking his head while he drives. “I thought maybe you’d gotten over this after we went to that Lizzie Borden house or whatever.” 

“It’ll never be over,” Sam says proudly. And it won’t. Even if it somehow became less interesting, which it won’t, it’ll be a connection to Jess that he’ll never sever. He puts his headphones back in and presses play. 

Jessica would probably love this channel. She might even copy the makeup looks, following along while Bailey talked about the cases that Jess never lived long enough to hear the ending to. Maybe they would watch together, cuddled up in bed with a laptop open, pausing every now and then to discuss the case. Maybe he wouldn’t even know about the channel, still watching Jess put on her makeup in bed, her hair everywhere while she makes those ridiculous faces at herself in the mirror, trying to get the eyeliner just right. Maybe they would still use their mornings to talk about true crime and serial killers while he watched, entranced by her every movement. Maybe. What if. Forever. 

**Author's Note:**

> Bailey Sarian is amazing. If you are interested in true crime/murder and makeup, go check out her series, [Murder, Mystery & Makeup](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLCprSpAj-wvAf6l9ulK_2B_4BrHJM4j1s)! Viewer discretion is advised.  
> (That's what Sam is watching in the fic!)


End file.
